11. And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful that the risk it took to blossom – Anais Nin.

07. Apr
/
Adventure, Blessings, Peace, Risk, Self Love,
/
No Comments

I woke this morning with a heavy head and feeling restless. One of the things I love most about where I live is that I can see the beach as soon as I walk out of my bedroom. I walk across the road and the ocean is in front of me, it immediately soothes my soul. I’m not quite sure how I managed before. It all feels different now and for so many reasons. What I do know is that I can take a walk to the beach and instantly my being feels harmonious and at peace. Nothing else seems to matter at that point other than the roar of the waves and the sand between my toes. Sounds super corny I know, but it is how I feel.

As I watched the sun rise I felt the promise of a brand new day with no expectations other than to light up the sky and shine its magnificent light. I know when I do have a heavy head writing is something that allows me to empty my thoughts, to see again with fresh eyes and a new perspective. I have been doing a lot of reflecting and processing in the last few days. A lot of changes have taken place and for now I have finally stopped and have been able to embrace the new.

So as I sat this morning feeling restless I knew that writing would allow me to be present. I came across this quote and connected with what it felt like for me. Change is inevitable and it is what we create with it that makes a difference. The last 9 months I have moved to a different state, moved into shared accommodation, moved out on my own, found a job, left a job and about to start a new one. I have felt heart ache and opened up to new love. The emotions connected to it all have been somewhat overwhelming at times and the ocean my best friend. The outpour of what I have been able to explore in that time is a knowing that I can never go back to what was and nor do I want to.

Remaining in a tight bud doesn’t really work for me. I’m not really sure it is meant to work for anyone. Instead what I do know is the gift of risk far outweighs the pain of staying the same. It is not always an easy path. The stirring of emotions can at times avalanche into a mixture of pain, and growth ultimately leading to a new found path of peace. A feeling and place that allows you to feel the rhythm of your own soul and to hear the whispers clearly, for this is where self-love truly blossoms. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

Sonia xxo

14. “Don’t just fly, soar

The other day I came across a magnet with the words “Don’t just fly, soar” I loved what it meant and it really resonated with what I was feeling. I decided to buy it as a little gift for my new home. I got to the counter and paid for my items. Somehow the magnet flicked off the bench and broke. I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. I had already paid for it and the lady behind the counter simply just said “oh”. I suppose there wasn’t too much else to say. There really wasn’t too much that I could do other than pick it up and put it in the bin.

As I walked away I couldn’t help but feel somewhat annoyed that I had just broken an item that I had just purchased. I know first world problems! As I caught myself feeling that I was in such a first world problem kind of mind frame I recognised that it was also an opportunity to learn a lesson. I must say that the learning these days seem to appear pretty quickly. I am grateful for the agility of these moments. I could have taken the broken magnet as a sign that perhaps I wasn’t ready to soar. (Such a victim mentality and story) Instead I turned it around and recognised that I didn’t need a magnet to know and recognise my worth. Or it could have just possibly meant a magnet fell and broke. Whatever! It is doesn’t actually matter, rather it is how we choose to spend the moments that matter the most.

How we choose to interpret what is going on around us is what is most poignant in our growth. We choose whatever it is that we want to see. It possibly makes the difference in whether we are just flying or soaring. I can choose to see a broken magnet or I can truly come to know and understand that I have managed to learn a lesson, distinguish growth and fly that little bit higher than I did a few days ago. We are the creator of whatever it is that we choose to do and I am learning this thick and fast these days. I have no distractions, there are no “other” things for me to do and I am in the moments of what matters most.

What this also means is the difference between flying and soaring. I can choose to be in flight or I can soar to places that I have never been before. Trust me I don’t have it all worked out because I am being pushed beyond a zone that I have not known. A place that there is no familiarity or reference points to a life that I once knew. It is fun and exciting? Yes for most of the time it is but there is also the other part that is emotional and overwhelming. We can’t have one without the other. So why would we just fly when we can truly soar to heights of life that hold limitless potential. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxxo

10.What is your why?

13. Jun
/
Adventure, Awareness, Beautiful, Change, Connection, Love,
/
No Comments

I watched the movie Collateral Beauty a few days ago. It is one of those movies that leaves you pondering and for me wiping my tears and snot from my face. There were so many profound lessons and moments that I took away, and for parts of it I am still processing the dynamics. It was about connection of life and the interpretation of time, death and love. Within it there was the collateral beauty of what it all brings and perception of what life truly means and is.

Life is so much about connection and without it out we lay dormant. For me right now I have made a decision to relocate to another state. In just under a short month I will move to Queensland. So what is my why? I feel like it is time to challenge myself to a place where for most of the time the skies are blue and I don’t have to wear 4 layers of clothing to feel warm. Ok so that is not the only reason. For me connection is so much more and right now at this time I am not feeling it in Melbourne. I am so blessed with an abundance of family and friends and for 42 years I have called it home but I just feel like there is more. When we truly connect to who we are and what we are here to do with this one precious life we are in flow.

Life changes and for most of the time it just is. It presents us with challenges and hurdles that we wish we could simply F*&k right off. It is what we do with these moments that ultimately shape us to the people we are and the role that we play in our world. We can either choose to feel like we have been hard done by or we can turn it around and live from a place of harmony and joy. It doesn’t mean that it will be easy for we cannot have one without the other. We would never know joy if we did not experience pain. We shy away from pain and the feelings that bring us the most discomfort because we feel like it is too hard to go there. We connect with others through our emotions and experiences. If we are not delving into the depth of our soul, connection waivers and perhaps we are only half living.

So when I reflect on this next chapter of my life instead of analysing the crap out of what if, I simply say to myself why not? Am I fearful of the next chapter and moving to another state away from everything that I have ever known? Absoufuckinlutley! But you know what I am more afraid of not going and never knowing. What I do know is what life has taught me so far. It has taught me to take risks, to know that life is measured by the love we give and most importantly to be of service to precious humanity. To be kind and loyal to one another, even in the moments of distaste and injustice. Actions of destruct are never OK nor are they pleasant. What I have come to understand is that hurt people, hurt people and where there are so many disharmonies we simply must be peace. What I do know is that my why is simply to be love living and to find the beauty of all that is. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxo

7. “Let’s get lost.”

A friend sent me this quote a few days ago and it has been on my mind since then. It got me thinking about another quote that I particularly love. “Not all who wander are lost” J. R. R. Tolkien. I have been back a few short weeks from a holiday of a lifetime with my dear dad in Italy. I have spent a whirlwind of 3 weeks connecting with my paternal family and was enveloped with an abundance of love and a treasure chest of goodness. I have landed smack bang to Melbourne’s looming winter and have not loved it. I can hear myself whinging about the cold and grey days and I don’t like it. I refuse to let the holidays “blues” settle in. So I ask myself now what? What is it that I want to create from this one beautiful life that I have?

The largeness of life, the gift of generosity and the natural state of being in my heart seems to have dissipated somewhat. It has been the same kind of feeling that emerges each time I return from working in Cambodia. For me Cambodia is a place where I feel totally in my heart and leading from a place of deliberate action, opposed to just being. I am not sure it is something that I can simply write in words rather it is a feeling and knowing that where you are is exactly where you are meant to be.

I attended a drumming mediation last night and it has confirmed for me very much the feeling of connection and following your heart home. It is not to say that I don’t ever feel at home in Melbourne but rather the feeling of connection and purpose in all that I do. My work climate along with the current reforms is something that I battle and I am not in flow. The inequality to those that live with mental health issues will serve a greater injustice and my energy is spent on frustration and fighting a neurotic battle that makes me feel disconnected. So when I reflect on being “lost” it is about finding a different way. To know that there is a bigger purpose. To really and truly step into your purpose and follow your soul to where it is meant to be. In this space there are no questions, and there are no second thoughts. The mindless chatter is eradicated and the connection to self is one that the soul is able to recognise. The feeling of “home” represents being in your heart and that life is in flow.

So when I feel into “wandering” or being “lost” for me it is not about wandering around aimlessly, in fact it is quite the contrary. It is about the connection to self and others. It is about stepping up and being in alignment with what truly matters. There are no guarantees, there is no promise of tomorrow and all we have is right now. So for me it means staying in your heart and listening to the gentle whispers of your soul. For when we are truly connected magic does truly happen. Blessed be and so it is.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxo

6. Collect moments not things.

30. Apr
/
Adventure, Love, Travel,
/
No Comments

I have just spent almost 3 weeks in Italy with my dad. The quote or saying “collect moments not things” has been one that has certainly played through my mind more than often. As the last day comes to a close the goodbyes are certainly difficult to endure. I may have done my part in the area of Italian leather boots, but what I have loved the most are the moments that have captured my heart. I have loved meeting my cousins and I have so many!! My dad is one of 11 siblings so to say the least the number of family members overwhelms me.

I have loved meeting some cousins for the first time and others that I saw about 11 years ago. Most are in my age bracket and there is a connection with some beyond words. I have loved establishing relationships with my dad’s brothers and sisters as an adult and have felt an overwhelming sense of love and kinship that will be etched deeply within my heart. Speaking to cousins with an understanding that we have travelled similar experiences has created love that contains no boundaries of time and space. A depth of understanding that comes from a place that is shared and understood.

I initially had some reservations about travelling with dad. I wondered how we would get along and whether we would at all. After all we have a somewhat “typical” father daughter relationship and tend to bicker – just because we can. What I have loved is that I have learnt to understand him as man, an individual before he became my dad. I have understood his courage and resilience more than ever. His life was one that was led with scarcity. I have heard him say time and time again that life may have been tough but there was a unity that existed amongst the community that is no longer. So when I refer to collect moments and not things I can certainly take on the lessons that I have learnt on what has been an adventure and an avalanche of emotions. They have cascaded from a place that I did not know existed but they now take a special place in my heart in life.

To sum up the three weeks in a blog does not do it any justice. Instead what I can take away are the moments that have captured my heart. The goodbyes have been bittersweet. The extremities of the arrivals and departures are ones that are heart opening. I know that there is a love that didn’t exist before and a heartfelt pain that comes with distance and loss. I have captured moments and memories that are beyond anything that can ever be spoken and only felt. To collect moments with my dad on this trip to his motherland has been beyond what I could have ever imagined. Collect moments, not things. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

oxoxxo

5. “Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip Toe if you must, but take the step.”

(Dad & I)

I have been in Italy for the last week or so. Dad and I have travelled back to his motherland so he has the opportunity to see his family. When I saw the quote for today I thought about him at 72 years of age and making the decision to travel. I don’t really need an excuse to travel or explore so when the opportunity presented itself I was more than happy to go with him. It certainly hasn’t been a holiday where there has been lots of sightseeing of “things” but what I have encountered are lessons that will always remain.

From the moment we began our trip together I have loved watching my dad and all that he encounters along the way. It is funny that at some point in your life the roles of parenting reverse. This can be confronting but it can also be a time where the opportunity is one where growth is paramount. Dad hadn’t been inside an international airport for almost 30 years and he was in awe and captivated by what he saw. I admit there was some trepidation about travelling with my dad. At times we have a typical father\daughter relationship but for most of the time he is simply my dad. Watching him with fresh eyes and not just as my “dad” has been a lesson of empathy and compassion.

Dad was born and raised in a small town in Calabria. The main town in which we have spent our time has a population of almost 1,000 people. I am from Melbourne, Australia so one can imagine the contrast and extremities of difference. I have loved watching dad in his surroundings and being reunited with family and friends that he hasn’t seen for almost 30 years. It is a feeling beyond words and one in which has allowed me to understand my dad in a way I have not known before.

For him especially making a small step and deciding to reunite with his siblings has meant so much more. His journey will always belong to him and whatever needs to take place for him will. For me this small step has allowed me to be in a space that I have not felt before. Usually consumed and challenged with time and a lengthy to do list, I have been forced to slow down and just be.

I have loved the serenity and mindfulness of being in each moment. The art of detachment in drama is one in which I am learning the most. After all Italian families and drama can inevitably go hand in hand. I am savouring in life lessons of what is important and what matters most. Being open and present is important especially when Italian is not my native language. The freedom of simplicity is bliss and one in which I value most. Sometimes the smallest times allows the greatest lessons to be learnt. “Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip Toe if you must, but take the step”. Blessed be.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxo

3. Sometimes it is the fleeting moments that teach us the most.

27. Mar
/
Adventure, Awareness, Beautiful, Blessings,
/
No Comments

Life presents us with so much and it is entirely up to us in how we choose to deal with it. Sometimes the moments can be long and arduous and others may be short and fleeting. It can also depend entirely where we are at any particular time on how we choose to respond and react to the situation. There is a saying that I particularly love and it reads “people come into our lives for a reason, season or lifetime” Sometimes the reason hits us like a ton of bricks and throws us into a whirlwind that we did not anticipate. It can be beautiful and scary all at the same time.

I have been working on writing my book for almost a solid year now and I have finally finished. Fifteen years of an epic tale (even if I must say so myself) told in 36 chapters. When I set out to tell my story it was to create awareness about suicide and prevention. The lessons that is has taught me through the writing have been paramount and ones that I feel will always continue to teach me. The difference now is that the lessons have been learnt and the story is done. What transpires along the way is where the magic truly happens.

Life happens regardless of what bubble we are living in. I truly feel that our lives can throw us curveballs to monitor just how well we have learnt the lesson. Sometimes it is the fleeting moments that teach us the most. When we are present and in the moment, it is then that we can truly appreciate where we have been and what is yet to come. When we get stuck in where we have been and keep rehashing the story there is no growth that can occur and drama continues to play itself out. It is heavy and the energy is dormant. I’m not sure about you but for me it is a pretty difficult way to live and there is no flow. Magic can’t come in and disconnection to self occurs.

Instead when we live with an open heart, remain in our integrity and are our true authentic selves, life flows and is at ease. It is easy to be dramatic and blame. Far out I have known this for so long and to be perfectly honest it is boring and dull. It doesn’t mean that the pain and hurt doesn’t not exist, rather it a choice to live without fear and ego. Ultimately what do we have to lose?

Don’t get me wrong some lessons have been tough and I can still wear my angry pants. What is different is that now I recognise my self-worth and understand that the most important relationship that I can have is the one that I have with myself. So no matter what happens in life and what is presented I can only learn lo love more deeply and my heart can never be broken it can only be more open.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxox

19. You are at once a beating heart and a single heartbeat in the body called humanity.

I am in Siem Reap Cambodia at the moment working with Head Heart and Hand Holidays. It was quite early when I was woken up my music. It wasn’t the soothing sound of the monks chanting, rather a combination of celebratory fast paced music that kept playing in my head. So instead of feeling frustrated about not being able to go back to sleep, I decided to make the most of my time and write my blog for the day. There is no surprise that it is perfectly aligned with my time in Cambodia and funnily enough the music has provided me with a rhythm to write. Just like my favourite quote by Dr Wayne Dyer “when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”

The affirmation presented today could not have come at a better time and I love the flow and magic that life offers when we truly allow ourselves to feel. This is now the 5^th time that I have travelled to Cambodia and feels like home as I soon as I walk off the plane to the tarmac. The tuk tuk ride on the way to my accommodation is the best feeling ever! I love my time here and the way it makes me feel. There is simplicity and freedom that I have nestled into and I am so grateful for such an impoverished country that ironically has given me so much richness. A richness that cannot be bought rather allowing the lessons of life that can only be felt through learning and truly accomplishing the success of failure.

We are simply a reflection of the world we see. Sure there is poverty and mouths to be feed but there is also so much love, community, compassion, integrity gratitude and simplicity that I learn from the most. It is never easy to know that so many people are not able to eat or receive simple medical attention or that they may never receive an education simply because of where they are born. The injustice used to feel like it was suffocating me. Now there are lessons learnt, although I still feel the injustice I just choose to deal with it differently. It is not just about the work that I do in Cambodia rather it is about the compassion I am towards others and myself every other day. Working in Cambodia is the easy part. It is the way we act and treat precious humanity every other moment is what matters the most.

It is not about jumping on a plane to Cambodia (although Head Heart & Hand Holidays[i] was life changing for me) rather it is what our own personal and moral responsibility to the earth we live and to each other. It is about recognising oneness and knowing that we were all born to dance to the rhythm of our own beat in whatever way we choose. You are at once a beating heart and a single heartbeat in the body called humanity. Blessed be and do it is, so it is done. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoxoxox

[i] http://www.headheartandhandholidays.com.au/

18. The Journey

The title of the affirmation today comes from a coffee shop that I am sitting in front of at the Gold Coast airport. I am waiting for a shuttle bus to pick me up so I can stay with my bff for a few days and I am so excited I may just wee myself! I usually take my affirmations with me when I go away but clearly I forgot. Instead of being regimented I decided to sit and write about whatever I was presented with and so here I am. There is something about packing a suitcase and heading to an airport that fills me with such excitement, so I suppose when I saw the words “The Journey” staring at me I took it as a sign to write some words.

Yes it is exciting getting on a plane and going to visit wonderful places or connecting with loved ones. What I truly love about travel are the experiences along the way that define and shape the journey for you as in life. I have had such beautiful connections on the way from Melbourne to Gold Coast in such a short time that it has whooshed me straight into my heart space. I make a conscious and deliberate action to be present and to be in the moment of what I am doing, unless I am reading or writing. Even as I wrote on the plane today the man seated next to me asked me what I was writing about and we spoke for a while. There was a lady who sat next to me for a short while and we somehow began speaking about Cambodia. In such a short amount of time I was speaking to complete strangers about two of my most passionate topics, suicide awareness and Cambodia.

So yes right now for me it is about getting on a plane and having a little adventure to Bryon Bay but it also allows me to reflect on so much more than that. It reminds me to be in the present moment and to be reminded about the magic and miracles that follow us each and every day. We always seem to be waiting for this or that to make our lives just right but what if they were perfect just the way it was right now. What is it that we are actually waiting for? We only have right now and we have so much of our precious lives to live.

I am always learning for if I stopped I may as will be dead. I am not perfect far from it in fact but what I do know it that I am imperfectly perfect just the way I am. We have a moral responsibility as we live on earth and at the very minimum to be loyal and compassionate to one another. To be in service where we are sharing our unique gifts and lead an authentic life with integrity. It truly doesn’t matter where you have been but it does matter where you are going. For me right now I am looking forward to many moments of magic and miracles as they follow my days. Blessed be and so it is. So it is done. Namaste

15. Every day is an adventure.

Today I have spent most of the day in bed and nesting around my home. Not because I am sick or because I wanted to pull the doona over my head and wish the day away. Rather the contrary. I got home quite home late last night. I was at a fundraiser and had a night out with my sister and some friends. I danced like a rock star (well I thought so). So this morning or rather mid-morning when I woke up everything felt sore and sorry. I had to laugh at myself because clearly my body hadn’t moved in that way for a particularly long time. My arms ached and I could barely move them above my head. I am pretty sure this was from the copious amount of times I was waving my arms in the air or fist pumping to Bon Jovi classic song “Living on a Prayer”.

When I read the affirmation for today I have reflected on my very lazy day. Was today an adventure? Did I make very moment count? Well it was an adventure for me as I spent the day resting my body. While I rest I am also able to fill myself back up to keep doing the work that I do. I watched a movie that made me laugh and have indulged in way too many slices of raisin toast. Ok so I may not have had the most productive day but it was a day that I definitely needed to recoup and reenergise.

One of the main reasons that I love to write is that it gives me the opportunity to learn more about myself but also to inspire and allow myself to dig deep and uncover what I may not possibly be open to otherwise. One of the first aspects that come to my forefront when pondered the statement “every day is an adventure”, I particularly considered war torn countries and all who suffer at the expense of civil unrest. I thought about the lives that are taken from famine and living in 3^rd world conditions while I wake up being sore from dancing the night before. First world problems! I know! It doesn’t mean that I have to discount my life and world rather it is about creating awareness about the differences.

Such a huge contrast and injustice in the way lives are led. It doesn’t mean that we have to feel guilty or remorseful for what we have in lives, rather the contrary. I know for me the practise of gratitude is one that is essential to wellness. What it has allowed me to further consider is take a stock take of where I am at and allow my priorities to be considered. This week has been particularly inspiring with connections and synchronicities that have added a rhythm to the dance of my flow. It further allows me to explore the difference we can all make in the world we live. Every day is an adventure. Blessed be and so it. Namaste.

With a sprinkle of fairy dust and may magic follow your day.

HUGE LOVE

Sonia

xoo